Oh. My. God. Look at the lines!
They're lined up for blocks! They've camped out!
For video games. And phones. And sneakers.
America, have I got a deal for you.
Looking for the hottest tech? We've got the oPad, the fastest, smartest processor available today, generations ahead of the competitor, for the same price!
Gamers? We've got the mega-hit no-person shooter "Peace II, The Negotiator," along with other popular titles like "Afghaistan, The Peaceful Transition" and "Observer: Watching the Centrifuges Stop."
The little princess on your list will be glad you shopped tomorrow, as we're offering the toy of the year, the blockbuster "Self-Directed Sally" doll, the doll whose string you can't pull. But supplies WILL RUN OUT, so you've got tomorrow only to guarantees your daughters' happiness.
We've got tons of other specials in every department, from automotive and tools to everything for moms, dads, kids and grads, all available tomorrow, just for showing up.
But you may have to wait in line.
It might be raining. Or hot. Or cold.
It could take hours.
Unlike Black Friday sales at the mall, you might not get to lounge in lawn chairs. Probably won't be able to pitch tents.
But I promise, if you stay in line, you'll get in. And we literally can not sell out of what you want, we HAVE to give it to you.
If you stay in line.
Tomorrow Only.
ps
Act now and we'll give you a free solo Springsteen concert live. I mean, c'mon...