It was reported today in the
Washington Post that Bush/Cheney has set up shop in a "county considered so liberal, by Virginia standards anyway, that it's been called the People's Republic of Arlington by some Old Dominion conservatives."
One resident remarked "how about that? I'll be darned. Wow. I'm a little flabbergasted. I wonder why he chose Arlington?"
Bush campaign spokesman Terry Holt "chuckled" and said the reason that Bush chose Arlington was that it "came down to quality of life." "This is a great neighborhood," he said. "There are a lot of services here."
In a fictional, off the record statement, Holt said that Arlington was actually a fitting location because it perfectly illustrates the shortcomings of a local government under Democratic domination. "This county shows what happens when the Democrats get their hands in the cookie jar," he perhaps said. "Who wants quality of life in their local neighborhood when it means tax and spend, big government?" "Look at all those police riding around in new cars, the firefighters with the latest equipment," Holt asserted, "this is nothing but gold plated, bureaucratic government waste, don't even get me started on all these sidewalks and bike paths around here!" Holt then complained that Republican government would have long ago bettered quality of life by cutting taxes, outsourcing, and creating special "Walmart" commerce parks.